Tuesday, 28 June 2016

Thought of the day: Looking For a Job

Hey everyone!

I enjoyed writing the last 'thought of the day' post and while that was more of an information based post, this one is a lot more personal to my life. I'm currently doing an apprenticeship in Business and Administration but it finishes at the end of this week. I've been really worried about what's going to happen afterwards and I've been panicking about what I want to do. My main jobs for the past year have been to call up companies to see if our business can help them, but also to do the main admin work for the MD. While I've really enjoyed doing the admin and organisation I've pretty much hated the calling; it's just not my type of job and I'm not very good at it.

I'm the kind of person that panics about most things because I overthink things. I was scared about telling my boss that the calling wasn't for me because I was scared of what would happen. I had to plan what I was going to say so I that I'd say how I felt and not get sidetracked but when I finally told him, he was fine with it and completely understood, which made me feel great, but also made me think about how much I actually worry...

I want to find a new job within administration because that's the part I enjoy; I enjoy being organised and getting everything sorted. But so far, finding that kind of job has been really difficult. I know that everyone is saying how hard it is to find a job these days, but I had no idea how dishearting it was not to hear anything back. I finished my A levels a year ago and started my current apprenticeship a week later, so I never had a problem with looking for a job. But now, I seem to have applied for tonnes of jobs and not heard ANYTHING back, and it just makes you feel that something is wrong with you and your skills. I don't expect to get interviews for them all, or even hear back from them all, but I've applied for quite a few and heard nothing from anyone. I didn't want to do another apprenticeship because I felt like I was going backwards and stuck in the same loop, but right now my mind has changed to the idea that anything will be better than nothing and I've applied to more apprenticeships. 

I don't know if I'm being too picky with the jobs I apply for either, maybe I should just start applying for every job going? But then I feel as though I'm not aiming for something... I'm scared that I'll get messed around by a boss if I just end up going for a job that every college student usually goes for, like the disposable jobs you get in shopping centres just to fill up your time and gain a bit of extra cash. I just want to be able to find out why I'm not getting anywhere, why I'm not hearing anything back. My parents are supporting me brilliantly! While my dad is pushing me to find another job and giving me advice, he also knows that I'm struggling and is trying to help me calm down when I panic. He understands how difficult it is and isn't being harsh at all. My mom has been looking for other jobs too, for the both of us, and has been letting me know whenever anything comes up that she thinks I'd like or be interested in.

I've been looking every day for a new job and I'm trying to think of ways to fill my time while I'm still looking for one, as well as saving my cash... I'm not the type of person that's able to just sit around in my free time, I have to do something productive and have to get an end result; if I can't see my efforts at the end of it I feel as though my time has been wasted. I've gotten used to the amount I earn too, I buy a certain amount of things for myself each month but I also save my money for bigger things, like my car insurance or even longer term things, like saving for a house etc! I'm just scared that I'll end up losing that money and having to start from scratch... I just don't know what to do!

I guess I'll just have to keep on applying and waiting...

I'm sorry if this has been a boring post to read, but I wanted to include some more personal things in my life and there might be other people that are in my situation (almost certainly!). We all love a bit of gossip, and while this isn't front page news I thought it was worth sharing and I hope that it helps other people understand that I'm in the same situation.

I have my other normal beauty posts planned for the end of the week so be sure to check that out on Friday! If you're having any of the same problems, or have any advice for me, please feel free to talk to me!

Until next time...

TheDarkeowl
xox

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